How to Answer Your Kids’ Existential Questions | Geekdad from Wired.com

How to Answer Your Kids’ Existential Questions | Geekdad from Wired.com

“Mommy, Daddy…Are we real?” my daughter asked from the back seat of the car, as we made our way home.  She’s nearly six, and she asked this as if it were a perfectly ordinary question.
“Um…” My wife and I glanced at each other and shrugged. “What do you mean, sweetheart?” I asked.
She clarified: “Could we just be characters in a story?”  My son, seven-and-a-half, piped up and reiterated the original question: “Yeah, are we real?”
And so began a deep philosophical discussion, the first I’ve ever been in with participants under the age of eight.  My wife and I patiently explained that yes, as far as we could tell, we were real, but that it was possible that the world as we perceived it was all an illusion.  Since there was no way of knowing whether the world was real, we said, we might as well accept that it is, because we really don’t have a lot of choice.  As for whether we could be characters in a story, we said, that’s impossible because we have free will.  It took some explaining that yes, kids have free will too, even though their parents make a lot of choices for them.  But they really seemed to get it, to internalize the reasoning we discussed to the point where I could tell they were processing it over and over in their minds.

Ok. I’ll try this with my class this fall. How would you answer the question if posed to you by a 6 yr. old, in an age appropriate manner.

Please help nick help himself and others.

[Nick is a friend of mine, by way of Alejandra, and I can personally vouch for this as not only authentic, but very important and meaningful. Please consider helping.]

If you’ve never heard of Nick Dupree, a quick search on the web will bring up some interesting facts. Nick is a 26 year-old health care activist, writer, and former student from Spring Hill College in Mobile, AL. He also has an undiagnosed physical disability which necessitates the use of a motorized wheelchair and a ventilator to breathe at all times, and he requires 24 hour physical assistance to live.

In 2003, he made a major impact with his campaign to change Medicaid in Alabama by staying in the community and keeping himself and others out of nursing homes, dubbed “Nick’s Crusade.” (You can read more about it at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:NickDupree)

Unfortunately, though his campaign was officially successful, services and supports in Alabama remain abysmal. He receives 16-hours of nursing care per day, and his elderly grandmother covers the remaining hours. The nursing care has been so unreliable, that beginning in 2005 he was unable to continue attending college classes. There is no way to reach his goals of safe independent living in AL, despite his past role as a national advocate.

With his primary caregivers facing age and serious illness, and a brother with nearly identical medical needs, there just isn’t enough help to go around. It’s become more and more difficult and dangerous for Nick to remain at home. As his support network weakens, he faces institutionalization (or worse) unless he can live in a state with better services.

To that end, Nick launched a broad effort to relocate, and his network of friends and associates have helped him plan and execute a transition to the state of New York. By the end of August, Nick Dupree will enter a rehabilitation hospital, where he can finally begin to receive much-needed services. He can also begin to plan a transition to independent living in New York City, where services are more readily available to people with significant physical disabilities.

This is a vitally important move, with significant costs to match. A minimum of $3000 must be raised to cover necessary expenses of air fares for himself and his caregivers, transportation on the ground in New York, and temporary accommodations for care givers as he gets settled in. Donations are being coordinated through the Ophoenix Public Benefit Corporation, based in San Carlos, CA, a charitable organization dedicated to assisting patients with disabling medical conditions such as Nick’s.

Please help us raise money to relocate Nick from Alabama to New York. To donate by credit card or use a PayPal account you can visit: http://www.ophoenix.org/donation_NickDupree.html Your donation will automatically be credited to Nick’s fund. To donate by check, make your check payable to “Ophoenix Public Benefit Corporation”, and write “For Nick Dupree” on the check. Please mail your check to:

Ophoenix Public Benefit Corporation
774 Knoll Drive
San Carlos, CA, 94070

“For more information, contact the Friends of Nick Dupree (friendsofnick@gmail.com)”